Finally, we have done the first step. We went to the Jabatan Pendaftaran Negara on the 8th of September 2009, a day before the huge day for other brides (090909).

The night before, we planned to start our journey at 0700hr, so we could reach there at 0730. Then the next day I woke up late around 0730hr, so we depart around 0800hr and reach there around 0830hr. It’s my second time to Putrajaya. The first time was to apply for my paperworks at Lembaga Jururawat Malaysia(LJM). While Kim Fei was driving I told him it’s all new to me, I have not been to this side of Putrajaya, I have never gone through this bridge. I was so excited, I took a few photos.

Then Kim Fei showed me the building that we were approaching. That’s the building that we need to go to.

Then we parked at the opposite carpark lot. We saw a few people standing outside. One of them was dressed up holding a bouquet of flower, so we knew she was the bride. We proceed into the building.

That’s my hubbie in the photo. Candid camera!! It’s our first time in the building so we were looking around and as for me snapping around. The department is on the first floor.

When we reached the counter, lots of people were there. We saw 2 brides awaiting for their call. We proceed to the information counter and got the form to fill up. After filling up we proceed to get our number and we were the only one there to apply for the date. So we went up and deal with the application process. The officer told us that the month of September is fully booked, so we will need to select other date after 21 days approval. We told him that we want 8th January 2010. We are the first to booked that date. Haha..cause the planner book for 2010 is not out yet so the planner book on the table is only 2009. So we booked it and the officer explained the appointment letter given to us.

We were so excited, we walked around for a few minutes before we go home. We were discussing how many couple will be booking on the same date as us. After that we went home and announced to everyone that we have booked the date.

I even booked my photographer and make-up artist. This is real exciting. Another 3 months plus to go. Then I will be officially Mrs. Ting. But sadly to say I will have to wait another year for the chinese ceremony.

I am so excited, yesterday Kim Fei and I went to look around at the bridal shop. We only went to 3 bridal shops and we signed up with their package with the last bridal shop. I understand that other experience brides advice to look around every bridal shops but I fell in love with this one when I enter it. It gave me a peaceful feeling and I totally blended well with the sales assistance, her name is Wey Wey, she was so nice and she advice me truthfully and now white lies. We even tried on a few wedding gowns and I am totally flaunt with those gowns. It’s much better than the previous 2 shops I visited. Furthermore the package that they gave me are reasonable with quite a number of free things. The most attractive part is my extra ROM gown and coat for father in law. I am so excited with this. Can’t wait till January and May 2010.

Uncertain feelings. So many promises made and broken. It seems 6years and 6 months didn’t help to build our relationship. Still your level of understanding and knowing me is still shallow. I am getting rather tired of repeating telling how I felt. Every year I have to repeat all over again, every time the same topic and sentences, perhaps this is showing that there isn’t any improvement and yet it’s a waste of time.

Perhaps all these years I have been lying to myself. Telling myself to give you a chance, lets talks things out since its been so long we have been together. But the truth is things aren’t working out at all. Perhaps its time for me to face the fact.

Maybe I am too afraid to face the fact that once again my relationship comes to an end. Perhaps I am afraid to be alone again. The thought of breaking up, made me thought of the past. Another failure?

If this persistently continues till after the vow, there will be no return.

Am I demanding too much for you to understand me? I have not demand you to give me any luxurious things or romantic things.

It’s time to face the fact.

I just had a good rest after my night shift, had a migraine in the morning so my plans for today was all messed up. Didn’t manage to go to PC Show at Suntec CC but spent sometime browsing through the web for wedding dress. i found a few that I adore.

There is this one I fell in love with it on my first lay

This dress is so unique. I really hope to be able to find this dress for my wedding, else will have to have it tailor out. I heard tailoring at Guangzhou is cheap.

This one is the other one that I adore, look at the patterns on the top its simple and unique. Outstanding. Then look at thee flow of the dress…it makes the bride look so princess like and gorgeous.

This one is simple one but I like the bottom of the dress it looks unique… simple and nice.

Lastly but not least….I love this dress a lot…the pattern is so attractive, just nice not too many pattern. Wish I could find this dress too…Dress hunting starts!

I chose this song as the song for my wedding dinner entrance. As my fiance is not a christian, I can’t get marry in church. We have agreed to have this song along with my father bringing me into the hall handing me to him just like in the church to fulfill my dream.

I love you, the love of my life
I need you, our love is right
I’ve found the one that my soul loves
No other love means so much

I prayed to my God for a heart to keep
He gave me the one, He knew my needs
Over and over this love is sweet
I recognize the joy that makes our love complete
God gave you to me

You’re the one I prayed for long ago
Fearless trust I never thought I’d know
I’ve found the answer to my dreams
My eyes were opened to love’s mystery

I prayed to my God for a heart to keep
He gave me the one, He knew my needs
Over and over this love is sweet
I recognize the joy that makes our love complete
God gave you to me

The love of my life…

I love you, the love of my life
I need you, our love is right
I’ve found the one that my soul loves
No other heart gives so much
God gave you to me

You’re the one I love
You are the love of my life

I start to think whether am I making the right decision. Is this how I want my life to be? Is he the right person to share my life with?

From the view of outsider, we seems to be like a happy couple and the best couple. Are we really happy deep down, only both of us know.

Sudden low mood has drove me into my deep thoughts. Should I ask for something more that I should have? Rather than just thinking all for him.

It’s true my closest friend once said I am always doing and thinking just for him, but does it worth? I answered her it worth as he loves for me alot. Her reply if it worth he wouldn’t want you to be doing it all by yourself.

It strike me in deep thought that why am I doing all these for him, LOVE…..why am I always putting him in the priority rather than myself? Why do I sacrifice everything for him? LOVE….

Sometimes I felt rather tiring, repeating all over again, explaining to him over and over again. Still he doesn’t get it. He feels its something silly to think over it. It doesn’t need to spend so much time to think over it as tomorrow a brand new day and everything will be just fine as it is. Do not need to waste energy or time on it to make things better.

I was thinking….6 years and 6 months and 2 days… it is such a long time…

I am feeling in doubts…….and its not a good thing….

I have another 6 months to clear things before I make the wrong decision.

It is so difficult to explain how I felt I feel heavy, deppressed…..I think I am breaking down….but he doesn’t understand my feelings……He can’t sacrifice for me as he is always thinking for himself first….

Yesterday I was having fever and cough with slight sore throat. Seen dr and obtained medication throughout the whole day didn’t have much appetite only had bread with kaya and porridge.

Today I woke up late with headache must be due to the strong medication but had a good sleep. Then didn’t have much appetite either until now…with my brother’s temptation which I couldn’t resist. He ordered Pizza Hut for dinner….mmm…

That’s our dinner…I haven’t even had a bite yet, busy blogging…

Brother’s curry zazzle rice seems delicious as he just chomped away. haha…

I just had a bite of garlic bread and my appetite seems to be deminishing….

Last week was back at home town and had spent lots of time with my fiance and even discussed about our wedding plans. So it is fixed that we will apply on September for our registration to be on next year January 7th the day we got together. Was very excited about it, then our traditional ceremony will only be held the following year due to superstitious matter. Have to follow what the elderly adviced as if misfortune happens then I am to be blame, so to prevent such things happen delay another 4 months from the actual plan we had.

During my holiday, Kim Fei brought me to those restaurant that I wanted to try before I came to Singapore. He said I have got thinner than he previously saw me a month ago, so he wants to mke me gain more weight.

We went to Little Taiwan at ss15 opposite Taylor’s college for lunch…

It was nice but a little disappointment thinking it will be like that Little Taiwan restaurant that I remembered I used to go with my high school buddy at ss2, that one is even better. Misses those time lots, especially the food of course! haha..

Then we actually went to Frontera Bar and Grill at Jaya One as one of my friend told me to go there and try the food, so Kim Fei brought me there at the same time had drinks with his friends.

To remember where we park our car in case we forgot…haha

Was so hungry and last minute capture the photo

My darling’s dish – Beef rib, it was so juicy and soft AND HUGE! He couldn’t finish it up at first but its so tasty at last yumm everything into the stomach…

My dish – fried steak. Have never tried fried steak before besides those grilled ones. It was delicious as the texture of the beef wasn’t rough and hard, instead juicy and tender worth a try, I love the mashed potato somehow its different from Chilis and TGIF.

We had a great dinner that night, filling dinner and satisfied!

After eating and sleeping for the past 1 week finally 2kg which my darling was quite satisffied with the result of filling me up…haha…

Finally a week to spend at home with my family.  At the same time my sister came back from U.K., so we spend so much time together.

Yesterday we went to ss2 night market it has been so long since I been to the night market. We went to Wong Kok Char Chan Teng for dinner.

I had Guava Lime Juice, the Chocolate milk shake was my sister’s.

This photo is taken by my dearest fiance….my perfect photographer.

Then we went for a walk at the night market. Sister was craving for bubble tea, haha its been such a long time since she had it. At the same time my cousin brother is coming back today with his junior, can’t wait to meet the little junior JenSen.

That’s yesterday….

Today, mom bought me Lam Mee from Pudu wet market the famous Lam Mee. Mom will be cooking dinner tonight, yum yum can’t wait for it.

Yesterday was by sleeping day after my night duty, so came back around 11am and quickly do my house work. Then went to Jurong Point to buy the sandal that my mom asked me to buy on her previous trip down but unfortunately out of stock so mom is going to kill me when I go home next week. Then I went to have a quick lunch, I had okonomiyaki, my favourite.

I was sitting on the table number 19.

Delicious okonomiyaki, I didn’t manage to finish it up as I don’t have much appetitte to eat. Then I went to West Mall to get a cardigan that I spotted but then when I tried it on, it doesn’t seems to look nice on me, so I gave up and bought some dinner and went back home to rest.

Today I went to Bugis street to check out those clothings on sale for 10dollar each that I saw during my dear dear came down to visit me last few weeks. I bought a few clothes especially a cardigan that I wanted. Bought a maxi dress too, hope its nice on me.

I had Yoshinoya for lunch, it was such a long time since I had it.

It was a delicious lunch. I bought for my brother for lunch and dinner. Lazy to go out again once I am at home.

So that’s my day today, tomorrow back to work. Listening to radio Class95, Gloria Estefan feat N’sync on air, my favourite song.